In my last few months of my senior year of high school, one of my best friends died.
It’s been 5 years now since it happened.
People ask me from time to time if I still think about what happened that day or how often I think about him.
Memories with him run over and over in my head. I miss him deeply and think about him always.
We shared some of those deep moments that solidify eternal-friendships.
We both had our first girlfriends at the same time.
I went to my first real party with him – the ones with alcohol and all that.
We explored and trespassed and did things that I hope all high school kids get to do.
He was there on the best trip I’ve ever been on. SC-MALIBU-LA-OC.
He was that friend that I had a comedic f l o w with.
If I had one wish, it would be to go back to that week and stop him from falling.
I would seriously live every day of my life again just to save him.
I’m still quite close with all my high school buddies.
I’d like to think it is because I put the effort in, but it also has to do with his passing.
It made me doubt God. I understand that people pass – even when it seems like it isn’t their time yet.
But why inflict so much pain to a family…to a mother like that.
I have no words for how cruel that is.
With that, I try to look at the better parts.
Thinking ugly thoughts constantly, makes us ugly people.
So what’s the moral in this story then?
Besides the clichéd, “You only have one life - go live it!” – I’ve taken away a few things.
This event shaped me more than just about anything and I could rattle off ideas that have come from it, all day.
I’ll get to the point though. The big takeaway for me is: when you are with people, “Go deep”.
All of modern life is superficial and fleeting. Don’t partake in that.
Everything you have. Yes, everything – people, positions, places – are temporary.
People you think you care about or will get to know, are going to disappear from your life.
These deep moments, the ones that bond you for life, you need to maximize the amount of time you are in that zone with people.
I’m talking about moments like sitting around the campfire discussing life, laying under the stars, getting lost in unknown places.
It’s less about doing the craziest/most dangerous things you can do with your friends, and more about having authentic moments.
Jaime was real with me. We shared REAL moments that had lasting impacts.
Skip the cheap, short, fleeting-type of interactions as best you can.
Friends aren’t always going to be with us. They are going to be gone before we are ready for them to.
Use those moments with them wisely.